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F-Zero X
Grade: B+
Publisher: Nintendo (1998)
Reviewed: 2001/1/16

screenshotAn update of the old SNES game, F-Zero X is a futuristic racer featuring twisting tracks and fast action. This is what Wipeout should have been. The tracks are super wide, so you can concentrate more on your racing and less on staying on the track! And with 29 other racers (!), you will need the extra room. Unlike the flat tracks of the original F-Zero, these courses are loaded with loops, ramps, and tubes that twist every which way. It's not uncommon to lose track of which way is up! Going over huge ramps is especially thrilling because you have total control of your descent. Controlling your ride while careening through tunnels and around tubes is more difficult however. The track lengths are "just right", and much shorter than what you find in most racers. Another welcome feature is the lack of brakes - who needs 'em anyway? There are no power-ups, but you do have rechargeable turbo. Each character is illustrated in comic-book style, and the 30 futuristic hovering machines are customizable (although you'll need to unlock most of them). The sound effects aren't anything special, but the high-octane rock music suits the game well. F-Zero X's graphics are fast and smooth - even in the four-player split-screen. The scenery is very plain however, with few buildings or structures in the background. There are a few useless attacks, usually of the "spin-in-place" variety, but these are hardly worth mentioning. The addictive Gran Prix mode displays a "standings" chart after each race, and it's fun to ascend the ranks. F-Zero X is a very straightforward racer, and that makes it all the more engaging. I never cared for the original F-Zero, but this one is money. © Copyright 2001 The Video Game Critic.

1 to 4 players 

If you like this game, try: F-Zero GX (GameCube),
Wipeout 64 (Nintendo 64), F-Zero (Super Nintendo),
Speed Racer (Wii), Rage Racer (Playstation)

Fighter Destiny 2
Grade: D
Publisher: Southpeak Interactive (2000)
Reviewed: 2006/12/30
Rating: Teen

screenshotIf you thought all fighting games for the Nintendo 64 sucked, Fighter Destiny 2 will do little to change your mind. Destiny is cheesy with a capital "C". Its unlikable cast of characters includes a clown named Pierre, a Dennis Rodman look-alike (wearing a jock strap no less), a ninja named "Ninja", and an emaciated cow. The "Abdul" character is so insulting it could set back relations with the Middle East by ten years. The scantily clad Brazilian dancer caught my attention, but like the rest of the characters, she looks awfully blocky. Perhaps that's why the camera keeps its distance - to hide the lack of detail. FIghter Destiny 2 is one of the few N64 titles that favors the directional pad over the analog stick. The control scheme seems simplistic at first (mainly limited to the A and B buttons), but there's more to this game than meets the eye. I was surprised by the ability to escape throw attempts, apply locks, and execute counters. Unlike every other fighting game ever made, rounds are won by scoring points earned by executing ring-outs, throw-downs, counters, or special moves. The default scoring system seems a bit unfair (a throw-down is worth more than a ring-out), but you can adjust these to your heart's content. The fighting action is fair but lacking in intensity, and the hits seem awfully soft. The elevated platforms are pixelated as hell, and the scenic backdrops look totally flat. An annoying commentator constantly runs his yapper with idiotic comments like "C'mon let's do it!" and "You need to fight harder!" The music is generally awful, some of it sounding like an out-of-tune accordion. Besides the normal fighting modes, a "Fighter's Arena" mode lets you traverse a game board between fighting challenges. This adds some replay value, allowing you to build up your character with new moves and enhanced attributes. There are a few novel concepts here, but not enough to complete with the Tekkens or Virtua Fighters of the world. Fighter Destiny 2, like its predecessor, is destined to fade into obscurity. © Copyright 2006 The Video Game Critic.

1 or 2 players 

If you like this game, try: King of Fighters XII (Xbox 360),
Fighters Megamix (Saturn), Virtua Fighter 2 (Saturn),
Virtua Fighter Kids (Saturn), Name That Tune (Philips CD-i)

Goldeneye 007
Grade: A
Publisher: Nintendo (1997)
Reviewed: 2006/6/7
Rating: Teen

screenshotAs one of the first console games to offer quality multi-player first-person shooting action, Goldeneye is probably the most celebrated title for the Nintendo 64. I could lose my video game critic license by giving this anything lower than an "A". For fans of multiplayer mayhem, Goldeneye delivers a slew of options to customize every aspect of the intense split-screen battles. The frame-rate remains smooth even with four players, and the controls seem tailor-made for the N64 controller (using the trigger to shoot is particularly intuitive). The shoulder buttons let you aim your crosshairs with precision, and a handy auto-aim mechanism makes it easy to mow down multiple adversaries in a row. When are those terrorists going to learn not to stand so close to those exploding barrels? Nineteen weapons are available, and you can even wield one in each hand. The character models are angular but well animated, sporting impressive digitized faces. There's minimal blood in the game, but characters yell and contort in pain when shot. The multi-player modes are the main attraction, but there's also a wealth of secret agent missions to keep the single player busy. I found these missions to be well designed and refreshingly short. Loosely following the film's storyline, the varied locations include a dam, a frigate, a train, a Siberian base, and an Egyptian temple. While maintaining a low profile can be advantageous in certain situations, you can expect plenty of frantic shooting action. Goldeneye's attention to detail is amazing, with sophisticated operating facilities, destructible environments, and satisfying explosions. The audio is also top-notch, with crisp sound effects and a pulse-pounding musical score. Goldeneye was a groundbreaking title for its time, and many consider it to be the definitive game for the system. © Copyright 2006 The Video Game Critic.

1 to 4 players 

If you like this game, try: Goldeneye 007 (Wii),
Perfect Dark (Nintendo 64), Doom 64 (Nintendo 64),
Diddy Kong Racing (Nintendo 64), Call of Duty 2 (Xbox 360)

Hey You, Pikachu!
Grade: F
Publisher: Nintendo (2000)
Reviewed: 2007/12/30
Rating: Everyone

screenshotMy little nephew is currently going through a Pokemon phase, so when he walked into my game room he made a beeline for Hey You Pikachu. I'm glad, because it was probably the only excuse I'd ever have to review what one reader referred to as "a wisp of a game about nothing". Packaged with a microphone, Hey You Pikacku was an early attempt by Nintendo to incorporate voice recognition technology, and the results are not good. The game is played in virtual days, with the little yellow guy visiting your bedroom window each morning and inviting you on field trips to forests, beaches, meadows, and other boring places. Once there, you'll spend a lot of time watching Pikachu frolic around, much to the delight of my nephew, who laughed out loud while watching Pikachu's ultra-cute antics. Personally, I wanted to skewer the thing. Although clearly aimed at young kids, Hey You Pikachu is inexplicably loaded with verbose text which I was forced to read aloud. After a while, even my nephew was mashing buttons to expedite the process! Interacting with Pikachu is done by issuing voice commands, but the interface for this is absolutely deplorable. You have to hold in the Z button to enable the microphone - something I had to constantly remind my nephew of. This causes a "voice bubble" to grow on the bottom of the screen, and when it "pops" your voice message is sent to Pikachu. The problem is, you feel compelled to speak the whole time the bubble is growing, despite the fact that you really don't have much (if anything) to say. To be frank, I don't think it even matters what you say, because Pikachu seems to do whatever the hell he feels like. Playing Hey You Pikachu is like trying to pick up a watermelon seed - there's a lot of effort involved but minimal reward. I actually began to feel physically ill while reviewing this. With its verbose text and user-hostile interface, Hey You Pikachu is probably the most worthless game in my entire collection. © Copyright 2007 The Video Game Critic.

1 player 

If you like this game, try: Pokemon Stadium (Nintendo 64),
Mario Party 7 (GameCube), Disney Sing It: High School Musical 3 (Playstation 2),
Dark Mage (Atari 2600), Pokemon Pinball (Game Boy Color)

Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine
Grade: F
Publisher: LucasArts (2000)
Reviewed: 2009/12/15

screenshotDespite its first-rate license, Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine was only made available as a Blockbuster rental - and for good reason! Infernal Machine's storyline is captivating enough, but its stage design is poor and its playability is rock bottom. It's the beginning of the cold war and the Russians are trying to locate an ancient machine capable of summoning demons from other dimensions. Brief cut scenes convey the narrative through blocky characters that make bold gestures to compensate for their non-moving lips. It looks hilarious as the female character removes her pilot cap and shakes out that pixelated, chunky hair of hers. You'll travel to exotic locations around the globe including the Tian Shan River in China with its snowy mountains and howling winds. The control scheme borrows heavily from Zelda: Ocarina of Time, with context-sensitive action buttons, a Z-targeting mechanism, and the ability to assign items to the C buttons. Infernal Machine is a real nightmare to play. The camerawork is totally manual, so positioning yourself for a jump is tedious. Sometimes Indy can leap over a 50-foot chasm without a running start, and other times he can't even hop across a three-foot stream without falling to his death! You'll often need to hang from perilous ledges, but it's hard to determine which ledges you can hang from! The context sensitive controls are real pain in the ass. When standing next to a ladder you'll often have to finagle with the thumbstick just to get the "climb" indicator to appear. Considering the difficult moves you're expected to make in the early going, such erratic controls are unforgivable. Even when you know exactly what to do, you'll struggle mightily and often fling the controller in disgust. In later stages demons materialize on top of you, resulting in instant death. I was hoping the driving stages might redeem this game, but they have problems of their own. I enjoyed the rollercoaster feel of the minecart ride, but in the jeep I found myself driving up the side of a mountain before becoming suspended in some blue alternate universe. As buggy as it is infuriating, Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine is for collectors only. © Copyright 2009 The Video Game Critic.

1 player 

If you like this game, try: Lego Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures (Wii),
Lego Indiana Jones 2 (Wii), Casino Slot Machine (Odyssey 2),
Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom (NES), Young Indiana Jones (Genesis)

International Track & Field 2000
Grade: B
Publisher: Konami (2000)
Reviewed: 2007/1/14
Rating: Everyone

screenshotI've always had a thing for these four-player track-and-field games. The variety of events tends to even out the competition, so even if you suck at pole vaulting, you can make up for it in the 100-meter dash. When playing against friends, you'll experience some hilarious moments like long jumpers who land on their asses (missing the sand completely), and shot-putters throw in the wrong direction (including straight up). Track and Field 2000's tournament mode is composed twelve events, and they're slightly randomized which adds additional drama. Each is preceded by an elaborate tutorial depicting a virtual controller and a liquid-metal man (the T-1000?) acting out its commands. These cinematics may have looked impressive at one time, but they unfold too slowly and in some cases overcomplicate things. A few seconds would have been sufficient I think. On the field, the action is competitive and exciting. The athletes sport a decidedly angular look, but at least they have muscles texture-mapped onto their polygons. Their animation is lifelike, and they even react appropriately to their performances. Slow-motion replays provide some nifty camera angles, and professional-sounding PA announcers broadcast the introductions and results. My friends and I enjoyed most of the events, but there are a few clunkers in the mix. The weight lifting is ridiculously overcomplicated, the gymnastics is boring, and the lengthy swimming events are arduous at best. Clearly Track and Field 2000 could have been streamlined a bit, but that doesn't prevent it from being a worthwhile sports title. © Copyright 2007 The Video Game Critic.

1 to 4 players 

If you like this game, try: International Track and Field (Playstation),
Track and Field II (NES), London 2012 (Xbox 360),
Summer Games (Atari 7800), Decathlon (Atari 2600)

Ken Griffey Jr.'s Slugfest
Grade: B+
Publisher: Nintendo (1999)
Reviewed: 2006/5/25

screenshotWhile its basic gameplay is almost identical to its predecessor (Major League Baseball Featuring Ken Griffey Jr.), Slugfest provides a serious upgrade in one key area - the graphics. The first thing I noticed was the game's slick new menu system loaded with a lot of new options. On the field the graphical improvement is amazing. Not only are the players much higher in resolution, but they also appear more "shadowy", adding subtle realism. Apparently the crowd had to be sacrificed to facilitate the visual upgrade, because they now look like blurry wallpaper. But while the player models are better defined, their bodies still sport the same odd, top-heavy proportions. Slugfest's audio features a two-man commentator team, but while they sound professional enough, they sometimes go several minutes without saying anything at all. The best new feature is the "classic" mode, which does away with the tedious cursors in favor of simple, old-fashioned controls. It works wonderfully, and it's refreshing to just push the "swing" button instead of having to guess a pitch location each time. While Slugfest's developers were busy adding new features, I really wish they had included an instant replay system. After all, it's the 90's for Pete's sake!! While far from perfect, if I could only have one Nintendo 64 baseball game, Slugfest would probably be my choice. It has the slick graphics, simple controls, and non-stop action I look for in a baseball game. © Copyright 2006 The Video Game Critic.

1 or 2 players 

If you like this game, try: Ken Griffey's Winning Run (Super Nintendo),
Ken Griffey Major League Baseball (Super Nintendo), Major League Baseball Featuring Ken Griffey Jr. (Nintendo 64),
Bigs, The (Playstation 3), Pick Axe Pete (Odyssey 2)

Killer Instinct Gold
Grade: C
Publisher: Nintendo (1996)
Reviewed: 2003/11/5
Rating: Teen (animated blood and violence)

screenshotThe first Killer Instinct was a good-looking, combo-happy 2D fighter for the Super Nintendo. This slightly updated version features better graphics but questionable gameplay. There are still ten fighters, but three have been replaced. The fire guy and the raptor have been yanked in favor of a barbarian and two generic females. I suppose they needed more women fighters, considering the original game only had one. Old favorites that remain include Jago the ninja, Sabretooth the werewolf, Spinal the skeleton, and Fulgore the cybernetic soldier. In terms of gameplay, learning the ins and outs of Killer Instinct Gold should qualify for college credit. The manual covers basic techniques, advanced, and master "fighting theory", which explain openers, auto-doubles, end finishers, throw reversals, combo breakers, linkers, juggles, pop-ups, top attacks, counters, pressure-breakers, ultra-breakers, and shadow combos, just to name a few! This has got to be the most gratuitously complex fighter ever made. No, you don't need to understand all of these things to play, but if you don't, matches tend to degenerate into button-mashing marathons. I found Killer Instinct Gold less enjoyable than its SNES cousin, and more prone to cheap attacks and sore wrists. Graphically, the characters look astonishing, and a few of the 3D backgrounds (like the castle) are somewhat interesting. The edgy dance music is good, but it's hard to hear over the loud sound effects. There aren't many good fighting games on the N64, and even fewer 2D fighters. Killer Instinct Gold serves its purpose, but didn't really advance the franchise too much. © Copyright 2003 The Video Game Critic.

1 or 2 players 

If you like this game, try: Killer Instinct (Super Nintendo),
Killer Instinct (Xbox One), Tekken Advance (Game Boy Advance),
Darkstalkers (Playstation), Street Fighter Collection (Playstation)

Knockout Kings 2000
Grade: C-
Publisher: Electronic Arts (1999)
Reviewed: 2001/12/15

screenshotKnockout Kings attempts to be a realistic boxing simulation, for better or worse. It's nice to have real boxers and realistic moves, but most matches tend to be long and laborious. The impressive lineup of fighters includes Mohammad Ali, Sugar Ray Leonard, Lennox Lewis, and Evander Holyfield. The animation is smooth and lifelike, and a fine looking polygon woman in a swimsuit introduces each round. Knockout Kings impressed me at first, but then the bell rang and the fighters walked through each other, that kind of took the wind out of my sails. As fights progress, the boxers get cut and bruised, and even wobble when weakened enough. Even so, they never really look tired, and tend to push each other away instead of "locking up" as they usually do in real life. The controls are a bit sluggish, especially when trying to block. The fighters look rediculous when sitting in their corners because there's no one else there! Where's their entourage?? The announcers sound terrific before the fight, but there's zero commentary during the actual fight, and that really stinks. Once the bout is over you can view replays of the best punches and knockdowns, which I really enjoyed. Some of the judges' decisions may leave you scratching your head, like the time I knocked down Larry Holmes but lost the bout just because he landed more punches! I hate it when that happens. © Copyright 2001 The Video Game Critic.

1 or 2 players 

If you like this game, try: Foes of Ali (3DO),
Fight Night Round 3 (Xbox 360), Evander Holyfield's Real Deal Boxing (Genesis),
Rocky (Xbox), Toughman Contest (Genesis)

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
Grade: B+
Publisher: Nintendo (1998)
Reviewed: 2004/2/18

This ambitious action/RPG title had a lot to live up to. Not only does it follow one of the greatest adventures of all time (Legend of Zelda Link to the Past, SNES, 1992), but Ocarina was the first to transition Zelda into the world of 3D. All things considered, this is a technically-impressive, well-crafted adventure. There are plenty of throwbacks to past games that will appeal to fans, but there are also some surprising innovations. For one thing, jumping is now automatic - you just run off the end of a platform and Link jumps. Another interesting new feature is the "Z-targeting" system which automatically aims at your enemies when you hold the trigger. Features like these ease the transition to 3D, but a negative side effect is the awkward camera angles. In order to locate creeping enemies or hidden switches, you'll be wrestling with the camera quite a bit. The controls are far more complicated than past Zelda games, but Nintendo made an obvious effort to make them as intuitive as possible. Ocarina of TIme's vast world is beautiful and is huge in scope - so big that a horse is provided to expedite your journey between dungeons. Like Link to the Past, the dungeons tend to be multi-layered, so you sometimes find yourself looking down at places you've already visited. There's a lot of interaction with townsfolk, and you can also play mini-games. Zelda fans will find themselves right at home with the familiar music and sound effects lifted directly from previous games. Ocarina of Time does have it's share of annoyances, like enemies that self-destruct after being killed, incessant beeping when your health is low, time-of-day related puzzles, and substantial backtracking. I didn't find it as fun or addicting as Link to the Past, but Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time is highly regarded by most, and certainly a landmark title for the N64. © Copyright 2004 The Video Game Critic.

1 player 

If you like this game, try: Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages, The (Game Boy Color),
Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker (GameCube), Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, The (Super Nintendo),
Neutopia (Turbografx-16), Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap (Game Boy Advance)

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