Bally Astrocade Reviews D-K

This is one of those oddball titles that collectors should not overlook. Dog Patch is a simple can-shooting game with two riflemen positioned on each side of the screen. A square "can" is tossed up the middle, and both players try to shoot it off the opposite side of the screen. Thanks to the analog knob on the Astrocade controller, you can finely adjust your aim.

What's cool is that these shotguns actually spray bullets, as if they were sawed-off shotguns. That means you don't have to be perfectly on target to hit the can. Both players will often knock the can around in mid-air, turning it into a volleyball game of sorts. The more hits the can absorbs, the more points it's worth.

Dog Patch is surprisingly fun and requires good reflexes. There's not much to see, but the large, multi-colored characters are nicely detailed. You can play solo for score, but the real satisfaction comes from going head-to-head. My friends absolutely fell in love with this game.

The only blemish is the high-pitched, cringe-worthy sound effects, which will make you turn down the volume immediately. Still, Dog Patch is one of the simple pleasures of classic gaming. I suspect Dick Cheney would love this game, despite the fact that you can't shoot your opponent in the face. © Copyright 2010 The Video Game Critic.

This is a surprisingly sophisticated football game, and if not for its tedious play-calling system, it would be classic material. Designed for head-to-head play, Football also supports two-on-two action (four players), which is pretty remarkable! The action on the field is fluid and lively. After hiking the ball, you move the quarterback and can adjust his arm to throw at any angle (by turning the knob).

When the ball is in flight, you control two receivers while the defense controls two cornerbacks. It's fun to fight for the ball, although it can be hard to tell who came down with the thing! Still, with a little practice I found myself consistently picking up first downs. Each contest is played with four-minute quarters, and it's a shame you can't adjust that because it's way too long!

But Football's real Achilles heel is it's play-calling mechanism. Only the offense selects a play, which involves watching a cursor move slowly down a list of five formations. You move the joystick to when the cursor is next to your desired play, but get this - you always have to sit through the entire sequence - even when you pick the first play!

I suspect this time-consuming process was meant to provide a mechanism for disguising your selection, but it's not worth the aggravation! Even if the player on defense diverts his eyes from the other player, he can usually hear the joystick move! When playing a friend it was hilarious how he resorted to various coughs and unnatural body movements in order to hide his selection.

I was also amused by the two play-calling sheets provided. While one is clearly designated "for YELLOW TEAM" and the other is labeled "for BLUE TEAM", they are in fact exactly the same. There's a lot to like about Football, but the unwieldy play-calling system compromises the fun. © Copyright 2009 The Video Game Critic.

Not only is this a well constructed Galaxian clone, but it actually eclipses the original in terms of frantic action. This may be the fastest, most relentless shooter I've ever played on a classic system! You move a cannon back and forth across the bottom of the screen while firing at a colorful alien armada. There are fewer aliens on the screen than in Galaxian, but they are larger and multi-colored.

Blue drones line the bottom row, red ones fill in the middle, and two yellow, triangular "bosses" are perched on top. When bosses descend they are usually escorted by two red ships, and taking out all three nets you big points. The action is fast and furious as the aliens typically peel off in groups of 4 or 5 at a time! And these guys are fast!

The orange-and-yellow explosions look sweet, and when you destroy a boss the point amount is briefly displayed (nice). When you clear an armada - don't blink - because a new one immediately appears in its place. Likewise, when one player dies in the two-player mode, the second player immediately picks up where the other left off! The fact that the action never lets up prompted my buddy Steve to declare, "This is not a beer-friendly game!"

But even the breakneck pace can't hide a few flaws. First, when the aliens drop bombs, their bombs materialize about 10 pixels below the alien, giving you less time to react. And while there are nine skill levels to choose from, the difficulty seems to remain constant as you play. It's not that big of a deal though, since even the lower difficulties are formidable. In retrospect, I'm glad Galactic Invasion wasn't a faithful translation of Galaxian, because this game offers a unique shooting experience all of its own. © Copyright 2009 The Video Game Critic.

I may have been a bit harsh on this the first time around. The cart contains two distinctive types of games, albeit using the same set of cars. Grand Prix is your run-of-the-mill Indy racer with three tracks to choose from. Demolition Derby is a brawl in a mud pit. What makes these games special? In a word, four-player simultaneous play. Okay four words.

Three tracks offer sufficient variety and each car sports a unique appearance. There are really two car designs and two colors, providing four possibilities. Two driving modes are available, with "pro" incorporating some drifting action. You can configure each race for up to 99 laps, and if you're playing solo, racing against the clock is also an option.

The steering controls are curious. Pushing left or right on the stick initiates a turn, despite the fact that the joystick also has a twistable knob. Still, there's a lot to be said for its four-player racing. In the two-player-only Indy 500 (Atari 2600, 1977), one player would sometimes get off to a big lead, resulting in a pretty boring race. But with four cars crowding the track, that's less likely to occur.

It's hard to get a lot of separation when touching grass or another car slows you to a crawl. It kind of bugs me how cars tend to "climb" over one another. Scott M. tried taking a shortcut across the grass, but the game was intelligent enough to see through his clever ruse, discounting the fraudulent laps. Scott learned a very valuable lesson that day. Not really.

I was hoping the Demolition Derby mode would be the proverbial cherry on top, but it's kind of confusing! Each car begins with a certain amount of health points, displayed across the top. The cars seem to dive backwards by default, and it's hard to tell where you're supposed to hit each other to deal damage. I do like how disabled vehicles serve as obstacles for those that remain.

Perhaps most impressive about Demolition Derby mode is that if you don't have four players handy the CPU fills in the remaining players! That's right - you can play this solo if you like, ramming CPU vehicles till the wee hours of the morning. The AI may not be all that great, but it's a 1981 game so let's cut it some slack. Work with me, people!

In the end, Gran Prix/Destruction Derby delivers on its promise of multiplayer racing mayhem. It's a shame there's no damage modeling, but hey - Sony had a 45-year head start with Gran Turismo and they still can't get it right!! © Copyright 2025 The Video Game Critic.

I couldn't help but notice how my friends' eyes lit up as soon as I put this one on. After subjecting them to a few complicated games they were probably thinking "now this I can play!" Gunfight is your basic wild west shootout which was common on early generation consoles. But this one may be the best thanks to its sharp graphics, sophisticated controls, and raucous action.

Gunfight comes built right into the Astrocade console, so it's always present on the main menu. You begin by setting the number of rounds, and I feel like ten is about right. Two well-animated, multicolored cowboys appear on both sides of the screen. An obstacle like a cactus is situated in the middle so you can't just immediately shoot the other guy.

The controls are remarkably good. Not only can you move freely around your side of the screen, but turning the knob on the control lets you finely adjust the angle of your gun independently of your movement. You accuracy is pinpoint and you shots really zip across the screen. These pixel-sized bullets are a far cry from the clunky squares of Outlaw (Atari 2600, 1978).

Each cowboy only has six bullets per round, so if you fire with reckless abandon you may find yourself a sitting duck. When only one player is left with ammo a short count-down begins on the top of the screen. If time expires, the round is ruled a draw, so start dancing.

Gunfight doesn't have any variations but it feels like it does. That's because the scenery changes between rounds, gradually incorporating cactus plants, evergreen trees, and moving covered wagons. You can shoot away most scenery and even ricochet bullets off the top and bottom of the screen.

There's no single-player option, but Gunfight is ideal for a quick shootout or better yet a round-robin tournament. My friend Eric was so impressed he asked if there was a replay option! I know he was speaking tongue-in-cheek, but it just goes to illustrate just how advanced this 1977 title was. © Copyright 2025 The Video Game Critic.

This super rare cartridge was packaged with a special analog joystick. Without that controller ICBM Attack is a good-looking but nearly-impossible-to-play Missile Command (Atari 2600, 1981) clone. ICBM stands for Intercontinental Ballistic Missile, often used to reference the imminent (or not) nuclear threat of the 1980's.

Cities line the bottom on the screen as a flying saucer makes passes overhead and drops bombs. The invader makes an ominous noise while slowly crossing the screen, but by aiming a reticule and firing you can neutralize him and his bombs.

It is possible to play ICBM Attack with the normal controllers; just not very well. You need to use controller one and two at the same time, as their rotary knobs adjust the X and Y axis independently. The first controller lets you fire from your left and right bases, and the second controller fires from the center.

I tried my best to grapple with the controls, keeping the cursor near the center and moving it up and down to catch the alien in transit. Fortunately the invader is a really bad shot with most of his bombs landing nowhere close to the remaining cities.

Even if you keep him at bay however the game inexplicably ends after ten waves. I wish I could play ICBM Attack with its original controller. It's not really playable in its current form, although it might be an interesting coop experiment. © Copyright 2020 The Video Game Critic.

If you want to see what the Astrocade system is truly capable of, give Incredible Wizard a shot. It's basically the definitive home version of the classic maze shooter Wizard of Wor (Atari 2600, 1982). Wizards, dungeons, and monsters are usually associated with medieval times, since that's when they were most common. Yet the instructions here present the game as a futuristic shooter, with your warrior armed with some kind of laser rifle.

The first thing that grabs your attention is the musical interlude that plays between stages. This ominous, otherworldly theme has a resonating quality that will positively knock your socks off. I've never heard anything like it. Wizard's exciting gameplay is characterized by frantic shooting, crisp control, and ever-changing gameplay. Your gun actually has a kick-back when you fire, and creatures blow up in a satisfying manner.

The fact that you can't shoot through their explosions slightly limits your destructive capabilities, but it is possible to shoot two creatures at once if they're overlapping. Monsters crawl around each level to begin, but gradually speed up, eventually going buck-wild and putting you on the defensive. Many creatures can turn invisible, so you'll want to consult the radar display at the bottom of the screen.

Upon clearing a level you'll face the wizard's pet Worluck. He's not hard to hit, but the Wizard is another story, furiously dashing around with guns-a-blazing. The game also supports two-player simultaneous play. The Incredible Wizard absolutely rocks the Bally Astrocade, but honestly this would be considered top-notch entertainment on any console. © Copyright 2016 The Video Game Critic.