A VERY SPECIAL MESSAGE
ABOUT VIDEO GAME MANIA 4
FROM THE DESK OF TUAN T
Suspicious Gamer Accused in Possible Conspiracy
Thorough Investigation Under Way
Contrary to popular belief, VGM4 did NOT go off without a hitch!! There is lingering controversy which taints the very fabric of VGM's ethical conduct code!
ONE PARTICIPANT (name withheld to protect his identity- but we'll just call him Pete Rose), who wore Oakland Raiders attire, had OBVIOUSLY practiced and memorized offensive/defensive schemes in Madden 2004 Football - thus annihilating every single one of his competitors. Heck, he was calling audibles and switching defensive formations while the CD was still loading in the PS2. Performance-enhancing drugs have not been ruled out.
I have started a petition (5 signatures and growing) to have Pete Rose's award and 2nd place finish removed from all VGM archives and documentation. The 3rd place finisher is now the 2nd place finisher. This meant that I could have qualified for the playoffs ( I was only one single point out).
Henceforth, VGM4 will always be remembered as the year of the Pete Rose incident. Where has the sanctity of VGM sportsmanship gone?
When asked for their comments on the Pete Rose situation, this is what some VGM participants remarked:
Rob: "That sh-t ain't right."
Jon: "I may be gay, but I know a cheat when I see one."
Keith: "It don't take a REEEAL MAN of GENIUS to see the injustice here."
Bobby: "I should shove that Madden CD straight up his crooked ass."
Maggie: "Dave, I don't want someone like Pete eating my delicious ham."
Tuan: "He's probably got cheat codes for checkers."
From now on, VGM4 will be know as VGM4* (asterisk).
Now, we must look forward to PornMania (no cheat codes allowed).
See you all soon!
- Tuan Madden 2004
Photo courtesy of Major League Baseball archives.