I've been in a major slump depressive lately, and haven't been able to get any writing done. Anything I've tried to start feels like pulling splinters. Today I finally managed to get some work done (only about 500 words, but still) and I actually feel pretty good about it. The working title is The Shapeshifter's Ring. What do you guys think? Is it worth continuing?
Chapter One
The wind whipped through Travn’s feathers as he soared hundreds of feet above Miraculum. From its vibrant green forests and pristine blue lakes, to its bustling metropolises, the Godlands were a paradise in every sense of the word.
Beating his wings in a pattern more familiar than his own heartbeat, Travn climbed even higher until he was level with the clouds. From here, he could see his destination far in the distance, the mountainous tower of—
A blur of motion whizzed by to his right, and the BOOM that split the air would have been deafening to human ears. To a hawk, it was like having a nail driven through his skull. Travn let out a shriek, instinctively reaching up to cover his ears with hands he didn’t have. A gust of wind struck him from the side, throwing him off course, and for a few seconds he began to fall.
Son of a… he growled inside his head, righting himself in the air. Even with a hawk’s vision, he hadn’t gotten a good look at the perpetrator, but he had a feeling he knew who it was anyway.
Sure enough, his keen eyes soon picked out a speck in the distance, rapidly—very rapidly—drawing closer. Juron had a mischievous gleam in his eyes, and a sadistic smirk on his face. His pure white robe billowed in the wind in stark contrast to his raven black hair.
Of course he wants to do this today, Travn thought in irritation. The one day either of us have somewhere important to be.
Fine. Let’s get it over with.
Travn waited until Juron was almost upon him, and then arched up into the air. There, he tapped into his powers, and felt his entire body quickly begin to grow. Feathers were sucked inside his skin, wings became stumpy forelegs. The savage beak on his face softened and expanded into a long, wide snout. In less than a second, Travn the hawk was gone.
And Travn the hippopotamus was plummeting straight toward Juron.
The other god had just enough time to let out a yelp of fright before Travn’s prodigious backside slammed into him from above. Together, they careened toward Miraculum.
“Get…off of me…you oversized cow pig!” Juron shouted above the rushing wind. He fought to get away, but Travn’s weight and the speed they were falling at had trapped Juron soundly beneath him.
For your information, he thought, the hippopotamus is a dignified and respectable creature. You could learn a thing or two from them.
Juron’s thrashing grew more and more frantic the longer they fell, but Travn merely yawned.
“Okay, okay, I’m sorry!” Juron finally screamed when they were only fifty feet above the ground. “I’ll leave you alone!”
Satisfied, Travn shrank to a fraction of his previous size, fur and a tail sprouting from his skin. He extended his arms and legs, letting his flying squirrel wings catch the wind. Another BOOM shook the air as Juron escaped back into the sky, but Travn ignored him and skillfully navigated his way to a nearby tree. There, clinging to the bark, he looked up. Juron hovered there for a few seconds, glaring down at him. His face was red with indignation the way it always was when he lost a fight, and for a second Travn wondered if he was going to break his promise.
To his relief, the flying god took off with another BOOM.
Should I keep working on this?
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
I say go for it.
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
Awful, just awful. Maybe you should take up drinking booze instead or maybe it was booze that created that awful, just awful writing.
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
Don't listen to Tron. It's not Ernest Hemingway but it is some good writing. Continue on my friend.
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
Any artistic endeavour should be pursued.
I feel anyone who shares their artistic projects should be applauded. It’s very brave to share whatever art that you create to an audience, whether it be paintings, photos, writing or someone clumsily playing a song at the local open stage.
I hope you continue your story and that it helps soothe your soul, which is the whole point of art
I feel anyone who shares their artistic projects should be applauded. It’s very brave to share whatever art that you create to an audience, whether it be paintings, photos, writing or someone clumsily playing a song at the local open stage.
I hope you continue your story and that it helps soothe your soul, which is the whole point of art
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
Yes, keep working! That's a great intro, I already feel like I know the characters.
- ActRaiser
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
Tron wrote:Awful, just awful. Maybe you should take up drinking booze instead or maybe it was booze that created that awful, just awful writing.
How many did you have before posting?
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
Good one ActRaiser!
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
It's a one joke scene, but you sell the hell out of that joke, and make it work for you.
That's the kind of charm that can't be taught.
Go for it.
That's the kind of charm that can't be taught.
Go for it.
- Stalvern
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Re: Should I keep working on this?
I can't help seeing this as a late-'90s cartoon like Hercules or The Road to El Dorado. Nice tone to set. I have some more detailed thoughts if you're interested, but the important thing is that the answer here is yes.