NES Reviews C

I wasn't very familiar with Captain Skyhawk when I began this review, but judging by the tons of copies at my neighborhood Funcoland, I'm guessing it must have been pretty popular at one time. And it's easy to see why, because this is a first class shooter with pseudo-3D visuals that represent the cutting edge for the NES. You guide a large, nicely rendered fighter plane over planets with geometric surfaces and triangular mountains. The landscapes don't look particularly realistic, but the crisp visuals convey a nice sense of depth. That's important, because you can adjust your altitude and even land to refuel during some missions. As you weave through valleys, you'll blast cannons, tanks, and helicopters. The animation is fast and smooth, with explosions that are modest but still satisfying. Enemy missiles can be hard to see, but moving side-to-side helps avoid these slow-moving projectiles. The diverse mission objectives include rescuing a scientist, dropping off supplies, and destroying strategic enemy bases. In addition to the planetary missions, there are also some air-combat and space station docking stages. The air-combat stages play like Afterburner, with enemy aircraft that zoom in and scale nicely over the horizon. Unfortunately, these air stages are lengthy and and tend to wear out their welcome. The docking stages are short but require precision and timing. Once docked, you can load up with several secondary weapons, including lock-on missiles. The game provides several continues. Be sure to check out the title screen music which is exceptionally good. Captain Skyhawk is an ambitious shooter that delivers with quality visuals and surprising depth. © Copyright 2004 The Video Game Critic.

You'd expect the first Castlevania sequel to expand on the solid gameplay of the original, but Simon's Quest took an ill-advised new approach. In an apparent attempt to make the gameplay "richer", Konami incorporated all sorts of RPG elements, transforming an exciting action adventure into a tedious exercise in collecting hearts, talking to characters, and killing time. Your quest begins in a quaint town, one of many you'll visit to collect items and gather information. Pressing the select button reveals a status screen which displays weapons, items, and other vital information - including the time of day. This is worth noting because time plays a vital role in the game. You'll need to purchase and trade items in order to progress through the game, but you can only do business with townsfolk during the day. At night, the villages are crawling with ghouls you slay to earn hearts. The idea is to rack up hearts before sunrise, and then use them to purchase items during the day, but it rarely works out so neatly. You need a lot of hearts to buy critical items, and too often I found myself waiting impatiently for the sunset or sunrise. Simon's Quest lacks the arcade flavor of the first game, but its graphics and sound are very good. The monsters include the usual suspects like skeletons, swamp creatures, and werewolves, but there are also new surprises like web-slinging spiders and hands that reach out of graves. The soundtrack is high quality, but much like the gameplay, it is repetitive. Simon's Quest is far more expansive than the first, so a much-needed password feature is provided. The game has three different endings, but don't expect much from them. Castlevania II just isn't as fun as the original game, and its new RPG elements weigh it down. © Copyright 2004 The Video Game Critic.

With its humorous visuals and competitive head-to-head action, Caveman Games has an intriguing premise but is aggravating to play. Like a prehistoric version of Summer Games, it contains six individual "sports" events that pit two cavemen against each other. Events can be played individually or sequentially in one big tournament. The graphics feature impressively large sprites rendered with a comic flair. The action kicks off with the "clubbing" event, where two Neanderthal men beat the heck out of each other on an elevated stone platform. It sounds like a good time, but stiff controls and choppy animation take its toll on the fun factor. The "Mate Toss" event is inspired by the Olympic hammer throw, but in this case you swing a cavewoman by the leg and hurl her for distance. It looks pretty hilarious, and is probably the most entertaining contest of the bunch. In "Dino Vault", you attempt to soar over a hungry T-Rex, but the unforgiving controls make this event too frustrating. "Dino Race" is one of those split-screen, button-tapping foot races with rock obstacles to jump over. It would have been a lot better if the controls weren't so confusing and unresponsive. "Saber Race" is another split-screen affair, but this time both players are chased by a Sabertooth Tiger. Players can push and shove each other as they head toward the safety of a tree. In "Fire Start", both cavemen are sitting next to each other in front of a pile of sticks. For readers who aren't Eagle Scouts, igniting the sticks involves rubbing sticks together and blowing on them. Not only is this event time-consuming and hard on your hands, but your opponent can also reach over and club you in the head just as you're about to get a flame going. That sucks! I reviewed this game with several friends, and although we shared a few laughs, I think we were all pretty relieved when it was over. I usually enjoy head-to-head competitions, but Caveman Games is too hard for its own good. © Copyright 2006 The Video Game Critic.

Whoa - this is the most bizarre NES game I've ever seen. Chiller is a gruesome, unlicensed light gun game created by twisted minds for twisted minds. The first thing you notice is its oddly-shaped cartridge that does not easily fit into the console. Once you get that working, you'll struggle with the controls. Configuring the game to work with the NES light gun is not easy. You'll need to plug the gun into the right port, but it's hard to tell if it's working because it's so unresponsive. You have to keep it within a few inches of the screen for your shots to register, and even then the accuracy is just not there. But as bad as the gun control is, it's actually a step up from the control pad, which uses a tiny, hard-to-aim crosshair. Chiller's control is deplorable, but I was fascinated by its graphics and sound. This game brings to life so many classic horror images. The first stage depicts a graveyard scene at night with a church in the background. Arms reach out of graves and toss skulls back and forth. Heads and limbs can be seen on the ground, and a mysterious woman pushes a baby carriage in the distance. Your job is to hit a certain number of targets in a fixed period of time. Actually, many targets are revealed by red dots that appear with when the screen flashes as you fire the gun. The second screen depicts the hallway of a haunted house with various creeps and apparitions. You'll see an arm fall from the ceiling and be retrieved by a hungry dog below. Then things get really twisted. The third stage shows some men strapped down, and you must shoot each part of their bodies until nothing remains. Is this sick or what? Fortunately, the cheesy NES graphics aren't realistic enough to be disturbing. In this final stage, a man is chained to the wall, another is in a guillotine, and a semi-naked woman is trapped in an iron maiden. Chiller is over-the-top by any standard. It provides some novelty value for adults, but it's definitely not for kids. © Copyright 2001 The Video Game Critic.

At first glance Clash at Demonhead seems utterly generic, but there's a lot of substance underneath its vanilla surface. You assume the role of a guy named "Bang", and you'll climb mountains, swim, explore caves, and hop between platforms in the sky to save your girlfriend. A branching map lets you select your stages, and that's an awesome feature. The stage layouts are arranged both vertically and horizontally, so falling and climbing can take you to new areas. I was pleasantly surprised to fall off the screen and not die for a change! Each stage is populated by random zany creatures like flying fish, birds, and robotic animals. Isn't that Mr. Bubbles from the old television commercial? The controls are responsive, and I like how you can shoot while hanging off ladders. Enemies move in predictable patterns and forging through the stages with your default pea-shooter is a pretty ho-hum affair. Once you discover the shop screen however, a world of possibilities opens up. The shop actually comes to you when you call it, providing instant access to items like boomerang guns, power boots, health drinks, and aqua-lungs. This is where the fun begins! Since defeated enemies drop wads of cash, it doesn't take long to afford the good stuff. You can even "buy" a password, and it's super long so you know you're getting your money's worth! Experimenting with item combinations adds strategy and dramatically boosts the replay value. The more you play, the more you appreciate the game, and its catchy soundtrack has a way of getting under your skin. Clash at Demonhead feels like an amalgamation of every NES platformer ever made, but as it turns out - that's not such a bad thing after all. © Copyright 2012 The Video Game Critic.

After reviewing the 16-bit versions of Cliffhanger, I felt compelled to give the NES edition a shot. The first stage does not inspire confidence. Sylvester Stallone (Gabe) resembles a little green leprechaun, and those rocky cliffs look awfully fake. Why can't I enter any of these log cabins? I can understand why wolves might want to attack me (because they are wolves) but what did I ever do to piss off all of these birds?! Cliffhanger was tricky to review, because if you stand still for too long your character simply drops dead. The opening stage is a real hardship. There's one section you need to climb across a rope (hold B), and dammit, Gabe just doesn't want to hang on! Even when you make substantial progress, using a continue sends you way back. What helps you persevere is the fact that when you're hit during a jump, it does not interrupt your jump. This is huge, because the game requires you to make a lot of long running leaps. If you can survive the first chapter, the difficulty eases up and the game gains traction. Trading punches with henchmen looks silly, but it's satisfying to watch them fall off the cliffs and plummet to their deaths. There are a few surprises, like when you beat up a boss and proceed to ride that bastard down a hill like he's a friggin' snowboard! Sweet! Occasionally you'll acquire a weapon like a knife or gun, but these are rare. I like how your score increases as you collect bags of money. Cliffhanger for the NES may seem like a total dud at first, but if you can overcome the initial frustration, you may find it worth your while. © Copyright 2013 The Video Game Critic.

If you enjoy any of the Rolling Thunder (Namco, 1989) games you will love Code Name: Viper. It uses the same engine for Pete's sake, so we might as well call it "Rolling Thunder in the jungle". In this taut side-scroller you methodically forge through enemy fortifications, performing strategic duck and cover while trading shots with adversaries decked out in a stylish array of colorful jumpsuits. The shooting controls are highly responsive and I like how most shots hit enemies directly in the face. Entering doorways allows you hide, reload, and occasionally rescue hostages. These female hostages are hooooot! Occasionally you'll find a tied-up skeleton in place of a hostage, crumbling to the ground. I guess I was a little late! Upon acquiring a grenade, I was like "how do I use this thing?" Turns out it's just something you're supposed to carry with you so you can blow open the exit. As much as I enjoyed Code Name: Viper I really want to tell the main character to put on some damn pants for crying out loud! This dude is taking this whole "commando" thing waaay too literally! I can't believe he marched into his commanding general's office like that! When he dies he slouches over with his bare ass sticking in the air! That's no way to go. Oh well, at least it explains his code name. Besides pants this game could also use a stage select. This omission is glaring considering the game displays a map of South America between stages. There are all the typical locations including jungles, docks, castles, etc. You know the game is good when you find yourself cursing like a sailor yet using every last continue anyway. Code Name: Viper is a clear winner, pants-down! Whoops I meant hands-down! © Copyright 2019 The Video Game Critic.

I wasn't planning on riding the anti-Contra Force bandwagon, but hey look - there's room for one more! This notorious platform shooter is probably the biggest NES bust of all time. The first two Contra games were legitimate NES classics, but this third entry is a catastophe. It tries to expand the scope of the single-player mode by allowing you to call in CPU-controlled partners (via the pause menu) to provide cover (for five seconds at a time). The concept is not outrageously bad, but the execution certainly is! The game feels terribly sluggish in general, but introducing another character brings the action to a veritable crawl! The constant fluctuations in speed wreak havoc on your ability to target an enemy or leap between moving platforms. Worse yet, there's a tremendous amount flicker that will have you wondering what the [expletive] is going on! The screen often doesn't scroll far enough, so you can't see what's ahead unless you "push" yourself into danger. The collision detection is lousy, and your default weapon has limited range. Even the selection screens are poorly designed and confusing. The situation is just as dire when playing with a friend, and that's a serious problem considering the Contra franchise was built on coop action. Looking at the positives, the graphics aren't bad and the opening harbor stage offers some nice views. The lively musical score has a definite Contra flavor. I tried giving Contra Force the benefit of the doubt, treating it more like a strategy title than an action game. But even so, its infuriating technical deficiencies had me cursing in disgust. There's no use defending this atrocity. © Copyright 2013 The Video Game Critic.

Crash 'N' the Boys Street Challenge is a goofy take on the Summer Olympics. This game seems to have achieved cult status over the years. The graphics are charming. The stages boast quaint neighborhood shops superimposed against majestic soaring skyscrapers. I also like how the characters exhibit dramatic facial expressions. The events have a penchant for violent mayhem. In the 400m "hurt-les" you tap buttons to jump low hurdles and slide under tall ones. It's also possible to hurl a broken hurtle at your opponent. Should you lose pace and fall off the screen, the game just tosses you back in the running. I guess the only button mashing that matters is the final two seconds before crossing the finish line? Hammer throw golf takes place in a park, where you're trying to see how few times you can hurl a ball on a chain to reach a hole 1000 meters away. Button-mashing charges your power meter and it's satisfying to watch your "hammer" soar into the air as the remaining distance counts down. I only wish there weren't so many water and sand hazards. In "water slaughter" competitors swim down a two-lane canal in the center of town. It's not so much about swimming as it is beating the crap out of each other. You can slug it out underwater or jump on your opponent's back and ride him like a bucking bronco! Yes, that looks hilarious. Next up is skyline scramble, which requires you navigate rooftops using poles (to vault) and unicycles (to ride along tight ropes). If you're timing isn't good with the vault you risk performing a Tom Cruise-style faceplant into the side of a building (too soon?). The final event, judo, is a one-on-one street fight. When clenched, fighters button mash for the opportunity to perform special moves like the "atomic drop" or "fingertip spin throw". The events aren't always fun but they are consistently entertaining. It took a while but my friends gradually warmed to Crash 'N' the Boys. Unfortunately, even with four players the CPU still insists on participating for some reason. The standings are difficult to read because they use confusing team and character names. A steep learning curve may deter some gamers, but Crash 'N' the Boys: Street Challenge ultimately gets over on its winning personality. © Copyright 2017 The Video Game Critic.

This is a likeable action-adventure along the lines of Legend of Zelda (NES, 1986). The game's ominous intro reveals October 1, 1997 to be the "end day" when the earth destructs and becomes overrun with mutated creatures. Thinking back, the only thing I remember from that day is picking up some McNuggets at a McDonalds drive-thru. Oh wait! That's right - I forgot to ask for BBQ sauce. Damn - I guess that was a pretty bad day! Crystalis begins in a small township where you gather bits of background information, obtain basic items (like a sword), and begin exploring the surrounding wilderness. Crystalis is easy to play, and the fact that your character walks at a brisk pace minimizes the tedium usually associated with traveling over large expanses of land. Short conversations are initiated by simply walking up to a townsfolk, which is great at first but can get a little irritating when you don't feel like talking. Most of the time you're searching for that next critical item which will unlock a new location or unleash the next boss. There's a nice diversity of locations from green meadows to snowy cliffs to hazy purple swamps. The dungeons are networks of halls and rooms sprinkled with wandering bugs and lizards. Slashing with your sword is easy enough, but stay alert because even smallest creatures can get in a few licks if you let your guard down. Crystalis is generally well designed but I dislike how you must "level up" to initiate key actions or defeat certain bosses. You'll experience the 1990 equivalent of "grinding" as you wander the wilderness searching for unsuspecting mushrooms to slay for the sole purpose of padding your experience points. One excellent feature is the save system, which provides two battery backed-up slots. You'll probably need to replace the battery in your cartridge (it's been 20 years for Pete's sake!) but it's worth the effort. As a potent mix of exploration, problem solving, and combat, Crystalis almost manages to out-Zelda Zelda! Note: Always hold in the reset button when powering off your NES system with a battery backed-up cart. © Copyright 2010 The Video Game Critic.