NES Reviews T

It's hard to have a legitimate conversation about classic football games without the word "Tecmo" coming up. Before Madden came along Tecmo was the only football game that mattered, thanks to its intuitive controls, simple gameplay, and arcade graphics. Sanctioned by the NFL Players Association but not the NFL itself, Tecmo Bowl features real player names but only twelve teams referenced by city. The action is viewed from the side and the main drawback is how you can't see receivers going deep. A handy dotted line on the field indicates where you need to reach for a first down, and this was ten years before the technology was used on live TV! The well-animated players are not only decked out in their proper uniforms, but even their skin color is correct! The visuals are exceptional but it's the tight gameplay that makes Tecmo Bowl such a winner. A simple passing system makes it easy to target receivers, and throwing to a well-covered man usually results in an interception. The running game lets you tap the A button to break tackles, sometimes tossing players across the screen in the process! Defenders can dive a country mile, but if you miss, the ball carrier might just take it to the house! You can't switch defenders during the play, so it's easy to get burned by a missed tackle. Tecmo Bowl shows its age with its limited options. You can't adjust the game length, although 1:30 minute quarters seem optimal (the clock stops after each play). You only have four plays to choose from, typically two run and two pass. You can't attempt a field goal unless it's fourth down, which is a real bummer when the clock is running out. Catchy music plays throughout and there's even some modest voice synthesis. I never get tired of watching the brief cut scenes (like players high-fiving) and the halftime show features some cheerleader hotties. The computer opponent is competent but the game excels at head-to-head competition. Trash talking optional but recommended. Tecmo Bowl is pure football joy and you'd be surprised how well it's held up over the years. © Copyright 2015 The Video Game Critic.

The cinematic intro to Tecmo NBA Basketball gets you totally amped up as a camera pans down an expansive arena packed with spectators. Cut-scenes of players in action are then displayed in a rapid-fire manner. If only the actual game was this exciting. The court is rendered with thick black lines meant to accentuate the wood but frankly it looks kind of ugly. The players blink like crazy and aside from their skin color they all look the same. After a score (or foul) the name of the player displayed, and yes, Michael Jordan is in this! The numbers 1 or 2 appears over the user-controlled players, but vertical bars are used to indicate which plays you can pass or switch to. As a result, it looks like a whole lot of 1's out there! What a mess. The ball doesn't stand out, so even when you know your team has the ball (they all head down court) it's hard to tell which player has it. Players perform free throws by jumping at the foul line which looks ridiculous. Once you get the hang of it, Tecmo Basketball is playable enough. I like how players mirror the talents of their real-life counterparts, and it's satisfying to finish strong at the hoop. Like Tecmo Bowl (NES, 1988) there are a few split-second cut-scenes spliced in with the action, but the lack of a half-time show is disappointing. The game offers a full slate of modes and options, including a coaching mode that I found really confusing. I love the ability to adjust the game speed and length. I have to give the game extra credit for its instruction manual - a 43 page tome that breaks down every real NBA team in detail. The early 90's was an exciting time in NBA history, so reading about the teams and players really took me back. Tecmo Basketball never reaches the heights of Tecmo football, but hoops fans will probably find enough to like about this. © Copyright 2016 The Video Game Critic.

The title screen for Judgement Day boasts a cool image of Arnold Schwarzenegger with red light illuminating the metallic half of his face. Awesome! So how's the game? Miserable! The opening stage takes place at a truck stop with shiny vehicles, starry skies, and distant city lights. Why is Arnold so tiny? He looks like a little kid scampering around in a Terminator Halloween costume! You'll use your fists to dispatch thugs that resemble Rick Flair with their flowing blonde hair. The fighting is an exercise in button-mashing and the animation is pathetic! Thugs being punched alternate between standing poses and throwing their arms back. When you try to exit the stage the game says you can't leave until you beat up more bad guys! Give me a [expletive] break! It turns out those motorcycle thugs are invincible! When I died the screen turned to white noise, and I thought my NES was broken! In stage two you drive a motorcycle diagonally up a canal with an 18-wheeler bearing down on you. I like how you can shoot open doors but there doesn't seem to be any way to prevent that truck from overtaking you. Well, I did find one way... and it's called the Game Genie (ain't too proud to cheat!) In stage three you're searching a hospital for Sarah Connor, shooting interns in the legs since the Terminator isn't allowed to kill people. It's actually more satisfying to shoot people in the legs because you get to watch them keel over in pain. It took me a while to realize the pursuing cop was actually the T-1000. In the next stage you're supposed to blow up Cyberdyne Systems by collecting and depositing barrels. I toiled through this stage for an hour before finally giving up. Had a Terminator been watching me review this excruciatingly poor game, I'd imagine he'd say "I know now why you cry, but it's something I can never do." © Copyright 2016 The Video Game Critic.

The title screen for this game features a pretty cool image of the Terminator movie poster, but that pitty-patter midi music sounds horrible! The opening stage does little to inspire confidence. Do you remember the scene in Terminator where Kyle Reese trudges through a sewer dripping with green ooze? I sure as hell don't, and I don't appreciate how every NES game has to have a [expletive] sewer stage! You hop between platforms and pipes, but it's hard to tell what's in the foreground or background. Adding insult to injury, the collision detection royally sucks. The health bar colors are reversed, which is confusing. Terminators appear early and often, including some that bear a cartoonish resemblance to Arnold. The problem is they are so stupid! Half the time they walk right off their platforms and plunge to their death! They aren't very scary and you can often simply avoid them. You're armed with a rapid-fire pulse rifle, but you must stop and crouch to use it. This makes the gameplay feel slow and clunky. While in the crouch position you can aim diagonally upward or downward. This helped me discover the little-known weak point of Terminators - their feet! It seems like I killed most Terminators by shooting them repeatedly in the foot. When you eventually you emerge from the sewers it's a real breath of fresh air - literally! The post-apocalyptic cityscape is a sight for sore eyes, although that moon looks more like the Death Star. There are a few driving stages but these are as shallow as they are brief (very). The next set of stages have you jumping between really narrow ledges while avoiding Indiana Jones-style spear traps. Wait what?! This is where you realize just how sketchy the jumping controls really are. And what's is the deal with these grenades? Those things are absolutely worthless. No wonder we lost the war. © Copyright 2015 The Video Game Critic.

Nintendo sued Tengen to have this cartridge pulled from the shelves in 1989. Many gamers swear up and down that this is the superior Tetris, but it's really not so cut-and-dry. Tengen's Tetris makes a better first impression with a vibrant title screen showing St. Basil's Cathedral and colorful fireworks. The main menu offers a variety of modes including one-player, two-player, cooperative, versus computer, and cooperative with the computer. The basic one-player game has a few interesting features. Statistics are displayed at the top of the screen, and completed rows are punctuated with the words "single", "double", "triple", and "tetris". After completing a certain number of rows you're awarded with a bonus and treated to a little intermission with tiny Russian dancers. That's nice, but there are some minor flaws. The statistics area encroaches onto the playing field, and it's hard to see the "next piece" in the top corner. The pieces are smaller than the Nintendo version but bolder in color. Unfortunately, when a piece drops into place, it turns the same color as the whole mass, and I don't like that. Finally, there are some subtle "rotation positioning" quirks that casual players will definitely not notice but experts probably will. The two-player head-to-head mode is what makes this edition so attractive. Each player can choose his own skill level or handicap, and you can play for score or lines. The coop and computer variations are not as exciting as you might expect. Both players are forced to share the same play area, which is confusing and aggravating when blocks bump into each other. The rarity of this cartridge is subject to debate, but it certainly is pricey. Tengen's Tetris offers more razzle-dazzle than Nintendo, but I'm not convinced it's a better all-round game. © Copyright 2013 The Video Game Critic.

The story of this game is about a neighborhood kid named Jake who meets a local magician named Zeb who believes Jake has "gnarly potential". The outdated dialog is hard to stomach, calling to mind Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure (Lynx, 1991). Zeb the magician may be the creepiest character I've seen in a video game. With those bushy eyebrows, winking eyes, and quivering lips, he looks like a creature from one of those Leprechaun horror films. Totally Rad begins like a typical side-scrolling shooter as you run along a path with nice amusement park scenery (Disney?) tucked away behind layers of trees. You'll blast green guys in hazmat suits, floating ballsacks, and old geezers flying around in pods. What makes the game interesting is your magic meter, which allows you to perform one of 12 spells at any time. And these are really useful, allowing you to replenish life, stop time, shield yourself, and fly. You can even unleash destructive spells to obliterate on-screen enemies. Best of all, all spells are available from the start. Magic comes in handy because enemies absorb multiple hits and some can be a real pain in the ass. Stage two takes place in a circus tent, and if you harbor any fear of clowns, this will only serve to reinforce it. After you shoot one down from balloons, it comes lunging straight at you! That's disturbing! If you die you have to replay the entire stage which is really bogus if you've already reached the boss. The third stage takes place in a gothic city, looking like a scene from Batman Returns (Konami, 1993). The game doesn't display a score, but if you scroll to the top of your spell screen you'll find an "enemy killed" counter. What the game really needs is a password. Totally Rad feels is extremely dated but the magic element adds an interesting, strategic twist. © Copyright 2017 The Video Game Critic.

Touchdown Fever begins with some colorful picture-in-picture animations showing a receiver catching a pass and a running back leaping over a pile. Could we be in for some Tecmo-style pigskin action? Nope! Touchdown Fever has serious issues. For one thing, the field's proportions are way off. A single yard is the equivalent of three yards in any other football game. As a result, you'll think you've completed a long pass only to learn it's "2nd and 3.7". That's right, these "yards" are so long they need to be measured in decimals. Imagine having to gain 30 yards for a first down. You have no choice but to select "long pass" for every play! The players are short and squat, which makes sense considering the overhead view. But what is the point of having the camera to pan all the way left and right before each play? The controls are a mess - especially after a reception. Sometimes pressing A makes your player run faster, but half the time it throws the ball back to your other receiver! If you're lucky a teammate will pick-off the errant pass before it's intercepted. I actually witnessed three interceptions occur during a single play! What the [expletive] is going on?! Does Touchdown Fever offer any redeeming qualities? Well, I like how it cleverly emulates speech by using beeps of varying tones. For example when a referee shouts "first down" you'll hear two beeps that kind of sound like "first down" in your head. I also like the fact that there are not one but two halftime shows (one for each team) starring both cheerleaders and mascots. The music that plays throughout is quite good and the game length is about right. But it speaks volumes when you play a game called Touchdown Fever with a friend and neither one of you even sniffs the endzone for the entire game! C'mon man! © Copyright 2019 The Video Game Critic.

With the success of the first Track and Field, Konami went all out with this sequel, dramatically enhancing the presentation and expanding the event list. It's hard to compare this to the first game, because it's completely different. First of all, the graphics are nothing short of spectacular. The athletes look absolutely huge and well proportioned - a far cry from the cartoon characters in the first Track and Field. In fact, these graphics may be the best I've ever seen on the NES. The audio is commendable too, with numerous voice samples sprinkled throughout. Track and Field II is more like Summer Games than Track and Field, with more realistic action and sophisticated control. The extensive event list consists of fencing, Taekwondo, triple jump, pole vault, freestyle swimming, canoeing, high dive, archery, clay pigeon shooting, hurdles, hammer throw, and horizontal bar. To be honest, I'm not sure if many of these events deserve to be in a Track and Field game. Fencing and Taekwondo play like mediocre fighting games, and I'm still clueless about how to use that stupid horizontal bar. The highlights of the game are the "real" track and field events like the pole vault and hammer throw, which tend to employ the same tap and hold controls from the original game. The archery and shooting events have been completely overhauled from the previous version, and these new versions are brilliantly conceived and satisfying to play. Track and Field 2 also offers new playing modes include training, championship, and a two-player versus contest. Unfortunately, the two player "versus" mode is sorely lacking, with only three events: Taekwondo, fencing, and… arm-wrestling?! There's no good reason why more two-player events couldn't have been incorporated. Overall, Track and Field II is an impressive technical accomplishment for the NES, but players who crave head-to-head arcade action will probably gravitate towards the original game. © Copyright 2004 The Video Game Critic.